Entitlement – A trap in disguise

Entitlement is like a silent disease—hard to spot, harder to cure. It sneaks in with false ideas about ourselves. We convince ourselves we “deserve” things or have the “right” to certain privileges because, in our heads, the world revolves around us. It’s the classic “Me! Me! Me!” mindset, and let’s face it, nobody likes that person.

But what does entitlement actually look like? Let’s break it down with some examples you’ll recognize:

• The child in the supermarket screaming for a toy, believing tantrums equal success.
• Expecting your partner to cater to your every need just because you think you’ve been the perfect partner yourself.
• A manager piling on unrealistic deadlines because they assume you’ll quietly comply.
• Assuming the person you’re about to ask out has to say yes because, hey, you’ve been so nice to them.
• Thinking God owes you blessings just because you’ve ticked off some daily rituals.
• Constantly canceling plans with a friend, assuming their loyalty is unshakable.

Sound familiar? These are the subtle signs of entitlement we tend to overlook. The reason it’s so hard to spot is because it’s rooted in ego.

Ego is like that annoying friend who skips to the end of a story, assumes patience is for “losers,” and tells you you’re always in the right. It makes you view your actions through rose-tinted glasses while blaming others for things they didn’t even do. The result? Guilt trips, misunderstandings, and unnecessary drama.

I’ve been there too. Every time someone disappoints me, my mind runs through the same cycle:

• “Look at all the good things I’ve done!”
• “If I were them, I’d have done better!”
• “Why don’t they just get it?”

All this, without pausing to consider what might have driven their behavior. Instead of understanding their perspective, I inflate my own sense of worth and end up creating tension. It’s exhausting, honestly.

This is why recognizing entitlement is so important. When we’re stressed, whether in a relationship or at work, it’s crucial to slow down, take a breath, and actually listen to the other person. Open communication helps, but here’s the twist: not everyone is ready to open up, and that’s okay.

People carry their past experiences into everything they do. Sometimes, they need space to process and reflect. Rushing them won’t help.

I know some of you are thinking, “But in passionate relationships, isn’t that impossible?” Sure, passion can be overwhelming, but here’s the truth: passion often masks weakness. Its impulsive, frantic nature is no substitute for discipline, clarity, and purpose.

We could avoid so much unnecessary drama if we stopped putting ourselves on a pedestal. Progress starts with slowing down, parking those irrational thoughts, and genuinely trying to see things from the other person’s perspective with no assumptions and agendas.

Entitlement is a dead end. Recognizing it is tough, but it’s the first step to becoming better, stronger, and maybe a little less insufferable.